Feb 4th/2024.Colonnade, New York.
After a long snowy cold of winter, Sun in New York gave broad smile .Yesterday also Sun was welcoming . I enjoyed the warmth of AC room last two weeks in utter idleness.
Today well protected with enough warm clothes I came out of the building for a walk. I was taking slow walk..... saw two beggars near the subway. of Colombus Avenue; one sitting on a walker with lot of quilts and warm clothes and packet of foods; the other one was also wrapped with enough warm clothes enjoying a tumbler of coffee
There were busy flocks of pigeons on the side of 8th avenue, picking foods from the disposable boxes scattered by the side on the avenue.And a lady with a girl of 3/4years was sitting on the ground with quilt and warm clothes .The girl looks sick ,may be with high fever and the lady may be poor but not so wretched to take shelter near the. subway stairs ;
I crossed her ; but I carry her in my mind while walking..... She seems to come from other place ; may be run away wife for unhappy marriage; wishing change for better life that is yet unknown to her !
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My father passed away during the festival of Goddess of Learning : the 7th day of full moon. As I opened eyes and noticed the timepiece , I saw it was 8: 12 am. It was. morning of Feb ,1978.
Every year a big fair used to be celebrated in my village at this time ; my father requested me to come with my son Raja who would enjoy the animals in cage all day long because the circus party pitched their tent on just the opposite field of our house.
46 years passed away !..........Father's image was quite fresh to me .
Today I remembered my father's earnest request to come when time was 8:15am...... just as 46 years ago!...( but he expired 3 hours ago of 8:12am of this day).
I woke up ;after shower I did rituals as usual every year.
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Now I seldom write about my family in diary ; as many of my close to heart are passed away. I don't know how far I am in the waiting list !
I came to know from my mom something which seemed to be queer and thoughtful to me in her last time in the hospital bed.
Reaching to the hospital I heard the hard truth from the doctor. It was detected that my mother was in the last stage of cancer with limited days.
.......My mother was wise enough to realize it.
The room was silent . The attendant was sitting near the balcony .
Mother with closed eyes murmured ,
' It is a great lie to think death is welcome by any person ; we all want to live longer, even when death knocks or blow whistle!"
......So does my mom longed for living when she was sure to die? My mom...so wise ...so cool and calm!
.....Those words ring again and again in my mind. ....the 'Truth' from my mom...
Did any of her children ask about her last wish ?... before the last days?
"O Time, please allow me some moments
I need yet to finish the due: some urgent ;
To share little pleasure and pain for my dear one...........
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