Sipra’s Diary: [Memoire, Chapter Austin]
As my husband passed away all on a sudden for the cerebral attack, my son brought me here to stay with him, just after the death ceremony was over. Leaving behind the land and accustomed life –busy with family friends and commitments, I reached in Austin. Everything happened so quickly without least apprehension of my awareness that I could not fathom that the change was as huge as avalanche to me. In India to find a piece of time for sparing on my own hobbies was so precious! Now I had so much time but no wish to do anything. I found that my passion for reading, writing, painting or singing, all were lost. I was so reluctant even to turn on TV switch/music or even any mild sound was also irritating.
At that time my daughter was studying in Ann Arbor, Michigan and we just started since a few months back negotiating for my son’s marriage. Now I have to carry out the responsibility singularly to find out for my son and then daughters’ suitable partners. To settle marriage from this far land through negotiation was not only complicated but also risky as both my children took a passive role. To learn the computer for communicating became an emergency.
My son had “lay off” within a few months of his father passed away; .. days hanged as long as week ; and week as month . I slept hardly 2/3 hours. I silently used to spy on my son whether he took sleep;I felt agony if I noticed him awaking ; I felt easier breathing in me when I heard sound of light snoring coming from him.
I was struggling hard to strengthen my mind.
TIME was hard and cruel ; yet so kind when I think that it never stagnated, stopped and take rest for a single moment; flows only down ward.............Looking back I found this page in diary, as if, viewing down the memory-land from the height of a flight........
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