debut: Fragments from my childhood

debut: Fragments from my childhood: I am a member of an amazing writing group called Story Circle - this story by me was published by them in their annual anthology I gr...

Fragments from my childhood

I am a member of an amazing writing group called Story Circle - this story by me was published by them in their annual anthology

I grew up in 1940s India with parents, grandparents, siblings and cousins.   My father was a loving patriarch who we adored. My mother was kind and soft-spoken. He worked for the Indian Railways and we moved often. As India celebrated Independence from centuries of British rule, we moved to a quaint town named Madhupur.  Madhupur was built to remind former residents of English villages they left and missed - mansions, manicured lawns, churches.  And railway employees were now being housed in those mansions.

Outside the atmosphere at home was very festive.  But I was not as cheerful as I should have been growing up in that loving environment.   I carried a sense of melancholy, sometimes for reasons unknown, throughout my life.

My father was the third of six brothers.  His eldest brother was an eccentric popular scholar and a professor at a prestigious university in another city. My father took up the responsibility of his four children, to allow his brother continue his scholarly pursuits undisturbed.  And his brother seemed to enjoy this arrangement.

 His eldest daughter, Renuka, who stayed with us, was beautiful and my mother’s confidante in managing our large family. Word of her beauty spread and brought many marriage proposals.  My uncle relieved himself of the responsibility of Renuka’s marriage and was happy for my father to make the decisions.   Arranged marriages were the norm and was considered a parents’ responsibility – a daughter’s marriage was considered to be great burden given the social pressure to get them married young and the financial pressure of sending the daughter to her in-laws’ home with jewelry and gifts. Marriage negotiations involved a complex routine of exploring families, bride’s home making skills and beauty and the grooms’ job prospects.  Finally a groom was chosen for Renuka.

My father wanted to celebrate this marriage magnificently to keep up the family status.  He distributed the marriage expenditure among his five brothers according to their financial capacity while he took up the largest share.  Renuka’s father was tasked to buy gold jewelry for the bride and groom.

The week of the marriage a massive gazebo was set up and Indian flute played in the background while all the children played under the gazebo.  My uncles gave my father their part of the expense.  Except for Renuka’s father.  And then on the morning of wedding I witnessed a drama unnoticed by most.

My mother insisted Renuka’s father to show the jewelry he was responsible for.  He sat calmly with eyes closed.  My father stood at the door of his room.  On being pressed more he said, “Renuka is beautiful, many princes will come for her hand even without jewelry, let us break this alliance”.  First there was silence, then disbelief and then my father was furious at his brothers’ suggestion and the thought of what this meant.  At one point my frustrated father said, “Bring me a gun, I will kill him and me”.  My mother somehow managed to pacify the warring brothers.  All the thrill of a wedding vanished like camphor for me.  I followed my mother like a shadow who slipped into the dimly lit room where Renuka was sitting with her mother.

Mother told Renuka that her father wanted the marriage to be called off.  Renuka embraced my mother and began to cry inconsolably, “Please do not listen to that crazy man.  I will marry here otherwise I will kill myself”

My mother said “But Renu, we do not have money to purchase the jewelry needed to marry you.  Since we cannot marry you without jewelry, maybe I will loan you my wedding jewelry.  Let’s keep it a secret ok?”

“But promise me that you will return it all to me because this is all I have to give for my daughters’ wedding”

Renuka and her mother leaped at the proposal, “Let us get the marriage ceremony done peacefully and we will return it.  We are ever grateful to you”

My mother left the room and in the dark of that room I saw Renuka and her mother’s face awash with a satisfied glow.  In the evening, all the women sat around the bride and praised the jewelry and how she looked like a princess.  My mother sat next to her proudly, partly at averting a family disaster and partly at the appreciation of her jewelry.  I sat there blankly and listened to the nostalgic tunes of the Indian flute which stirred a strong ennui in me about days gone by and what lay ahead, the happiness all around but the sad undertones of this festivity, which I witnessed.  I wore a brocade dress but all the drama of the morning had drained me, before I knew I was asleep.  I woke up late into the night and ran across the courtyard to the gazebo and saw Renuka and the groom standing by the fire, as the priest chanted wedding vows.  The courtyard was lit with lanterns and I thought my sister and her husband looked angelic.  I was hungry but could not find any food – tired I fell asleep again in the dimly lit room where much drama unfolded earlier in the day.

Soon after, my own sister Mira got married in another wonderful ceremony leaving my father submerged in debt from frequent marriage and medical expenses.  Every year Renuka and her husband visited us – she never mentioned the wedding jewelry or returned it.  Neither did my mother mention the loan or ask her for it.  I never heard my parents regret or boast about this act of sacrifice ever even in the worst of their financial struggles – much to my surprise, my mother seemed happy about Renuka’s happy married life and spoke of her with great affection. 

So often in life, underneath the joy and festivity lies the reality of a less joyous story and my heart fills with pride thinking about the nobility of my father and gentle mother in how they went about it all so gracefully.

 This picture is of me around the time this story took place

My parents and extended family.  Middle row extreme left - my father and mother

EMERGING COMPETITORS WITH BOVINE MILK::NEW SUPERFOOD

 EMERGING  COMPETITORS  WITH   THE BOVINE MILK: :NEW SUPER-FOOD!

   Along with some amazing benefits and boons 21 st century hosted us also a plethora of weird and shocking news:  the news of an emerging billion-dollar business which is not only unimaginable  but    ruthlessly unethical. I came to know by reading the article “The new business of breast-feeding” by C.Jung.

The electric breast-pump machine was a boon to the working new mothers who preserved in bottles or in ice-trays in the refrigerator for their own babies.  But now many new mothers who have excess breast-milk which their babies do not need to consume, they sell it at $1-$ 3 per ounce on the sites like onlythebreast.com.

Also some companies come directly to moms to collect and make it more nutritious by adding supplements…a new super-food!!

     Imagine!

Very soon we will see that spick and span hygienic buildings where new moms with excess breast-milk ,sitting in front of electric pump-machine in a row of cubicle  for each ,like any corporate office ,during their  3-months post maternity leave. 

Outside the building, truck of some big company will be seen  waiting ,with queer poster of human milk instead of the picture of  “horizon” or Brown-cow” etc, etc.

      Like a cartoonist I imagine to sketch  some bully rebel herd of cows standing aggressively blocking the entrance-gate  of the “Human-Milk” building in protest of their  emerging rivals………….with the slogan' "humba-humba…….protect our rights”....

   In    2013 Affordable Care Act was reformed and intertwined with the Insurance companies to cover the cost of breast-pumps and  as Medela ,a leading manufacturer in the US stepped in,  caused wide-spread use of pumps which in turn fuels the secondary market for human-milk.

So long breastfeeding has remained an integral bond between mother and child exclusively, far from the market of raising profit . In US law and order is in control of government and people are  health-conscious.

  But what about the women of third-world poor countries where average masses are ignorant and flaws of laws    are  rampant  to sweep over the” so-called law- and –order ”of the country?  The new moms of poor countries  will be  pathetically exploited as  resourceful commodities. Like buffaloes, goats and cows they will be given injection to produce excess breast-milk to raise profit. There may be massive health-hazard to the new moms and future siblings of the new-born babies The poor countries Will be full  of Sick mothers and crippled or deformed  babies.

In this globalization age   no profitable business will be confined in its place of origin.

It is bound to spread globally. Before it happens, I appeal,(but where?),yes, to the alter of mass-god ,to raise voice in protest  against it on the ground of global ethics.

There should be some Global Ethics which will hold the power to control and condemn each and every business, and specially  with vigil eye  on  any profitable Big- Business.

.....................................................................................................

mixture of romance and panic.

I  was not very friendly with  computer.Because neither i write nor I get  frequent mails from family or friends except  face-book, linked-in and some publishing houses .These publishing Houses made me crazy to publish my Writings which was my long-wished-dream.One day as I opened my mail-box  I saw mails from a new-comer.".AWAI",  which made me interested to learn internet so that I can join internet online business and proceed to my goal of publishing.After research  I  managed to join a free preliminary computer class for the seniors.My aim was primarily to learn cut &paste ,attachment-file, blog-writing and to transfer my creation to desired place/post.....So far I learnt only Blog-writing.
             But  it is a  story of new  romance! Throughout the day I  waited for  a chance to open the AWAI mails.Then lots of letters from the  unknown  began to flood in with the promise of potential clients and job offer.My family ,friends  and even the computer teacher  discouraged and cautioned me not to "click "any video.....they are all Spam,rubbish  Reading those mails I found nothing harmful  excepting  boring  lengthy letters to waste time and at the end to register name to reserve  a seat with$.......In  fact....they were selling  package.If they mentioned it in the beginning then I wouldn't have wasted my time.Only the willing persons would have spent time on those lengthy letters.I hated the tricks  and end up my romance with AWAI.
But I am so curious to  "click"  the video ,to know the truth ..whether it is a danger.I did it several times  but did not avail anything" free', as they promise.Those who created  panic in me ,they did not spare some moments to look and go through those mails .I liked the mails of Rebecca,  Nick usburne,Paul Hallinghead ,Bob Bly; I am thankful to them. They gave useful guiding.I want to get rid of my ignorance by learning internet  properly.
I think ,I have neither credit card nor bank account, then what have I to loose  on one "click?"
Nobody can dig my brain to steal the ideas ,some of which may be precious,to be polished and shine!If I fail to allow them to  come out,they will remain  as crude ore in the dark mines for ever.
         Million of quarries in my mind
                          spinning and squiggling;
        Hammer the brain ,to explore answers.
In front of me digital box
         which owns treasures and clues
beckons me to open the lock
But the mouse in my  loose palm
Roaming to and fro
                To find the right  key,
But doubt, digital panic and unknown fear
Captures and holds me before I click!!

DOROT - WELLNESS HOLIDAY PARTY

     Have you heard of “DOROT” senior center? I joined here recently.

 It presented a Wellness X-MAS  Holiday Party in 171 W,85 th street on  8^th December  in which I was invited. Party in the winter season is very common.

 But this party was meaningful  not for its  magnificence  or yummy food, fun ,decoration .dance or sing-a-long  but for its unique theme  and lofty idea!  ,The uniqueness is that it arranged  a warm hearty  union between the two generations : union of the young with the silver –hair seniors.

The hall was decorated with painting, glittering garland,.balloons ,flower-vase on each  table  covered with colorful table-cloth  which gave a grand festive look.

Under the supervision of DOROT  a bunch of young girls and few boys  from Burberry COMPANY came for volunteering.

The guests ,many of them were on wheel-chair or walker, were greeted with care and compassion by the volunteers. After serving   food coffee tea deserts and fruits ,the volunteers were  taking chats with the seniors .  Both    party ,  looked  cheerful   . with exchanging each others’ ideas  through  warm conversation .The CEO of the Institution came and gave short   welcome speech.  The in-charge of the institution and the person in-charge of Wellness program and some others were looking after all  over the program. Some of the guests entertained by presenting us their most memorable   X-mas day. The party was compact between 12.30 to 2PM. But the impact of the union would leave long and lingering impact.

In this era, when “Relationship” is falling apart. DOROT   sets

 up an example by taking a dynamic   step  to create a bridge between the new and the old  generation through this party

I  will   finish with a song sang by a volunteer boy  …..

“I love New York when it is spring,

I love  NEW York when it is summer,

l   love NEW York because DOROT is here!”

New wave of religion in 21st century:Religion of Love.

The end of 21st century will be marked with a great tsunami of Religious revolution which will come   as deluge  like  Noah,s Ark mentioned in the Bible.
     This new religion will  come with   tremendous luminosity,  cracking  down the shell of all racial and cultural rituals which are narrow, orthodox and discriminative ,will be wiped away.;and  the essence will be full of vibrant  spirituality,i.e .pure consciousness.

Through the amalgamation of multiple religions, Human race will come once again under the umbrella of One Religion,churning the ocean  of love . Surprisingly, a liberal   modern young generation  from all sects is  heading towards that mission.
  Either terrorism will dissolve in the elixir of the new religion of love or They  themselves will be cause of their own tragic destruction by quarreling and killing among themselves.

That will be the beginning of Golden New Era!

I believe, "deluge","Noah's Ark", are all  used as metaphors with some deeper meaning.
               

What fault in christianity?

In   Christmas holiday of 2009, we planned to go for a trip outside Mumbai But at that peak season of tourism, neither any ticket nor any decent hotel was available at that last moment My daughter searched franatically on the internet and at last found out some "odd-place" for Holiday. It was "Sivananda Ashram" at Neymar-dam, in Kerala. Not for tourists but for pilgrims; There also the only dormitory was available  We determined not to vegetate in Mumbai. So we were desperately ready to take the adventure of experiencing the odd and completely unknown place. I  was interested in the place as I  was impressed by reading the book of Swami  Sivananda quite long ago.

Neyyar dam is a small exotic village surrounded by hills and lush green, near Trivandrum. The Ashram was on the top of the hill, by the side of the deep large lake. On the other side of the lake a  lion -reserve where they were roaring now and then to entertain the guests.
The Ashram has a  beautiful temple decorated with art and painting, a chapel,two-storied hall for yoga-centre, a huge dining hall with a big kitchen and several buildings with rooms and dormitories for the guests. Swami Natarajan, an Australian man was the then president. All the sectors of the ashram were mostly run by volunteers who were Christians from all over the western world. Only Indians other than me, were   3/4 volunteers, several brahmin priests in the temple, cooks in the kitchen, and some native labours.
I was surprised to see so many foreign devotees, most of them young, in that remote village which was unknown to most of the Indians. They were singing and chanting in Sanskrit so accurately that I felt ashamed for my inefficiency. By asking I came to know from  European ladies that they were attached to the centre since long ago  There are many centres of  this Institution  too throughout the western world. They have taken 'Diksha' from Swamiji. As they had practised for a long time, they didn't feel Sanskrit as hard language 
I noticed how devotionally, after taking an early-morning- bath, these Christians were performing meditation, listening scriptures, doing yoga, prayer-songs dedicatedly from 5'0 clock morning.

I pondered why these Christians are so much inclined to Hinduism? However, I celebrated the best Christmas  of life and 31st December in Neyaardam with this global community;
On asking about their interest of coming,  most of them answered that they got profundity, and touch of spirituality in that place; the dry sermon of Sunday Bible reading failed to quench their thirst for soul-searching.

I wish sometimes I will write about Neyaardam and Paradise Island of Bahama in my travelogue.
In 2012   I went in Sivananda ashram of  paradise island, in Bahama, to celebrate 7-days'retreat during Christmas holidays Here also except 3/4 Indians,the rest were western, mostly young, came for taking 6 weeks' theoretical and practical spiritual training courses of yoga which ended with the exam before the Christmas retreat.

280 trainees came in that year. For excess accommodation, rented tent system was available.
 I was fortunate to be close to a global community. I have a curiosity about religion. I took Bible classes a few years back. In 2014 I took admission to Fordham University in Bible courses of Prof Shafer who was from Harvard.

 I  immersed myself in studying the Bible. As  I went deep and deeper, the realization dawned on me that in the nascent stage of humanity there was only one religion based on two instincts: Fear and  Hope which are still chasing human race but in different dimensions.

It was Land and Language which changed the colour and essence of religion influenced by the then powerful monarchs of the lands like Rome  Turkey, Babylon  Britain etc.

The Bible, especially the New Testament, is full of allegory and metaphors to keep safe and secured from the tyrant monarchs   who were a potential terror to acknowledge the supremacy of any power over them. The priests, in fear and for self-interest acted as the agents of the monarchs and not for the sake of religion at all.

.Christianity, the Gospels were too modern and scientific religion to be conceivable by commoners at that time. Then several hundred years were spent on the tug of war over monopolizing the Christianity between Constantinople and Byzantine, between the western and the Muslims.  History of blood-stained Crusade is an eternal disgraceful black chapter to not only to European history but to mankind as a whole.

The essence of  Religion remained unexplored, due to the long gap of the culture of the Religion during the crusade;  Only the dry shell of the Gospel was left for daily Sunday Bible reading as a monotonous ritual in the church. ..Perhaps,  very few enlightened priests or bishops were left to bear the rich legacy of spirituality to be embedded for the future generation. 

The church has less young and intellectual devotees and more seniors and blind orthodox devotional attendees. This is not desirable; The fault is not in Christianity, but in arousing interest in Christianity, failure to hold on the unquenchable faith of the restless youth.

In the course of time, the young Christian generation of 21 st century, started to search outside the church to quench their thirst for spirituality.

   How to get back the present young and the future generation back to the church?
Christianity needs to be revived by prominent spiritual thinkers and Christian leaders. It is high time to reflect on some of Jesus' most provocative questions find new life and meaning in the modern context of the restless world.

    I have started a small step in this project with vigorous effort.
I would like to explore it further.